Hello there!  This is ol’ Patches coming to you once again to share some of my little pearls of wisdom that I have found on the internet.  If you’re even a semi-regular reader of this site, you know that dad has referred to me as the Ossimistic[i] pup on multiple occasions!  That makes me feel pretty swell – you know that life has dealt me some pretty tough knocks[ii] … but I decided, way early on, that I was going to do my bestestest to focus on things that would keep me on the sunny side!  I figure that just about anyone (except Drunk Henry) can be grumpy and miserable – well, that’s the lazy way out … folks that are happy have to work at it a little bit … but boy ol’ boy, is it worth it!!!!

You see, the way I figure it, happiness - in your business life and your personal life - is often a matter of subtraction, not addition.  Therefore, I’ve compiled a list (along with Jeff’s help[iii]) of THINGS that you should STOP doing:

Blaming

People (and dogs too) make mistakes.  Employees don't meet your expectations.  People don't deliver on time.  Old bosses can be jerks!  So you blame them for your problems ...  

STOP:  Maybe you didn't explain your desires well enough.  Maybe you didn't build in enough of a buffer.  Maybe he has a Napoleon complex[iv].  You become empowered when you accept responsibility when things go wrong on your watch, which will cause you to focus on doing things better and smarter next time.  And when you get better or smarter, you also get happier.

Impressing

Folks don’t like you for your possessions, your title, or your accomplishments.  Some people may like your things - but that doesn't mean they like you.  And, if they only like you superficially, you’re better off without them!

STOP:  Genuine relationships make you happier.  You'll only form genuine relationships when you stop trying to impress and start just being yourself.

Clinging

When we’re afraid or insecure, we tend to hold on tightly to what we know (which also includes the bad stuff and stuff we know that we should let go of).  Now remember that an absence of fear or insecurity isn't necessarily happiness, it's just an absence of fear or insecurity.

STOP:  As long as you’re busy hanging on to stuff that you think you need, you can’t reach for and try to grab on to what you want.  You may not always be successful, but I reckon that the act of trying should make you feel better about yourself.

Interrupting

Interrupting is just plain rude.  When you interrupt someone, what you're really saying is, "I'm not listening to you, I’m just trying to decide what I want to say!"

STOP:  Listen, focus, ask questions when folks are visiting with you!  They'll love you for it … and you'll love how that makes you feel.

Whining

Your words have power, MOSTLY over you.  I believe that whining about your problems makes you feel worse, and can give others a negative impression of you!  If something bothers you, don't waste time complaining – work on fixing it!

STOP:  Bitchin’ about what's wrong.  Explain how you're gonna make things better, even if you’re just visitin’ with yourself!  Don't just be a shoulder for your buppies to cry on.  Friends don't let friends whine; friends help friends make their lives better.

Well, Jeff has ten points, and they are all certainly worth sharing … I have part two written and will post it in a little while.  I didn’t want to consume your evening with reading my ramblings.  But, I certainly do appreciate your time in reading this … hope it has, at least, given you something to think about! 

Consider, just for a minute (or however long you need to!), how STOPPING these aspects of your day to day will impact it – not only for you, but for those around you as well!!!

What’s it gonna hurt to try?  Worst case scenario … and if it’s your last day at work, you can always follow Johnny Cash’s example with ol’ Oney[v]!

Remember folks … follow your arrow!